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Now, here's an important question for those knowledgeable regarding such matters: if we are made of plants and our hearts do not beat and our blood does not flow, how do we get hard? Moreover, why does the blood not stagnate? And what kind of plants are we made of?
 
 
 
 
 
 
Isn't there some sort of fluid in plants that makes the leaves hard anyway? I could be wrong, of course. I never exactly made it a point to listen in Herbology.
...A point. This requires some research, I think.
As do most of the things you ask about, I've noticed.
Now, say. When did you die?
I haven't. I'm just so utterly amazing that I can travel anywhere I damn well please. The Bike is wonderful like that.
Ah. You followed the train tracks, then?
I was curious where they led to, so yes.
Have you been down to Hell yet? There are some very interesting people there. Most of my favorite authors, for example...
No. I think the Snape from my world would get more than a little distraught if I made my way down to Hell. Probably be afraid they wouldn't spit me back out, then make some comment about how he doesn't want me to go there quite as literally anymore.
Oh, you can get out just as easily as you can get in. It's not nearly as Biblical as it sounds, honestly. Most people are down there because that's where all the drugs and alcohol are.
Mm, I see. Well I suppose I'll wind up there, then.
I like to go back and forth, myself. The party down there is fun, but sometimes it's a bit much, you know?
NEVER!
...And Oscar Wilde gets a bit. You know. Touchy.
Well, now, that I'd have to object to. Someone else is quite touchy enough, I don't need others doing it, too.
Who might that be, out of curiosity?
Who else?
Ah. How's that going?
Considering we haven't killed each other yet, and I'm growing surprisingly fond of him... well, I should say.
That's very good to hear.
It's a little odd to say, though.
I can imagine.
It's angel magic, dude. Aren't you a wizard?
Actually, I've been losing my magic, lately.
..... hey, I don't know why that is. Are your buddies losing their magic? IS JAMES OKAY?!?!?
I have no idea, I haven't seen him for ages. It's rather distressing, actually.